This Post Contains Spoilers for Season 8 of Game Thrones.
Outside of the little mistaken product placement, Game of Thrones season 8, episode 4 was a pretty good lesson in character study. The first act of the episode was a party in the Game of Thrones universe that actually ends well, all things considered. The Night King is now dead, the armies of the living had a funeral for their fallen and a celebration of life, literally, is in order. This is important on several levels and I hope this article breaks it down in a way that is both easy to understand and entertaining. So let’s dig deep into an issue that has fans of Game of Thrones at odds with each other and themselves as individuals. The subject of the love triangle between Brienne of Tarth (Gwendoline Christie) Knight of the Seven Kingdoms, Jaime Lannister (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) The King Slayer and Tormund Giantsbane (Kristofer Hivju), the leader of the free folk.
As in many fandoms, we the fans always like to play matchmaker. It’s something we do that in a lot of cases, we don’t even know that we’re doing. With this latest episode of Game of Thrones, a lot of fans got their hearts broken because their favorite wildling, Tormound, was definitively rejected by the newly knighted Ser Brienne of Tarth. This caused a massive uproar. Brienne rejected Tormund Giantsbane and ended the night (and presumably a few others) with Jaime Lannister.
She made the wrong choice…… #GameOfThrones #GOTS8E4 #TormundGiantsbane pic.twitter.com/O4XAnNDT3C
— Kimberly Denise (@Its_Kimberly189) May 6, 2019
While I can understand how someone can get upset that the couple you wanted to happen didn’t, it still perpetuates a huge problem that persists in real life. That is the issues of entitlement and the issue of consent. I’m going to break this down in sections and explain why I feel that Brienne made a good choice and I’ll even expand on Jaime’s actions later in the episode as well. Also, keep in mind that I said good choice and not the right choice and I’ll explain the difference between those two dynamics in the part about consent.
- The Issue With Entitlement
First and foremost, let me just plainly say that just because someone likes another individual does not entitle that person to that individual in any way shape or form. Yes, fans of Game of Thrones have known for years that Tormund has been “interested” in Brienne of Tarth, however, you don’t have to look too closely to see that each and every time they’ve interacted, that affection has completely been one-sided.
In the cosplay community, the term “cosplay is not consent” is spread far and wide, because unfortunately, we live in a world where that statement is not already a given. People have had their own personal safety put at risk because others don’t understand this simple point. In Game of Thrones, one of the lows of the entire series is the treatment of women on screen. Yes, there are very strong and developed woman characters in the show, this article surrounds one of the many. However, in and out of the show people tend to backslide and treat them as if they are objects to be passed around or possessions to be claimed by whoever wins the joust.
Tormund, who is a great character, falls into the category of a male who sees a woman, claims her as his and is pretty much the textbook definition of what many may call an f-boy. He felt he was entitled to Brienne of Tarth from the moment he saw her and fans of Game of Thrones excused it because he was [now] one of the good guys and he’s hilarious when he isn’t objectifying women.
That takes care of the Game of Thrones in-universe problems with entitlement. In the real world, with the fans of Game of Thrones, I think that people got attached to characters and attached to ideas that they forgot that Brienne of Tarth is indeed a person in the Game of Thrones universe. She’s not an object to be claimed, she is a human being who lives in a world where she has to work twice as hard to get half of the credit. Does that sound familiar? So thinking that just because you like a character means that he HAS to be with another that you like, more times than not it’s simply because they’re both tall, is not only wrong. It’s downright disrespectful.
- The Issue With Consent
If you were upset that Brienne ended up with Jaime instead of Tormund, stop and ask yourself why. As I previously stated, each of their encounters left her visibly uncomfortable. She never gave him the time of day and their characters never, ever had any real chance to truly connect that was not intertwined with Tormund basically sexually harassing Brienne. So why would you want them to be together?
I mean seriously, Tormund is a man who basically shouted at anyone who would listen about how he would ravage Brienne at every turn. He had nothing respectful to say to her outside of questioning why women can’t be knights and even that moment was preceded by a story no one asked him to tell regarding giant’s milk. So why?
A guess a better question would be if exactly the same type of behavior was presented to you, how would you react? If a man LOUDLY let anyone who would listen, willingly or otherwise, know of all the things he’d do to your body, how exactly would you respond if you gave every inclination that you weren’t interested? More than likely your response isn’t that positive, so why should Brienne have gone for it?
At every juncture, Brienne had not given any form of consent, yet some Game of Thrones fans felt personally betrayed that Brienne didn’t go for it. And why would she? It completely goes against her character and what was presented to us thus far. So what exactly is the big deal?
Now a lot of Game of Thrones fans are angry at Jaime Lannister. Again, why? While I can see that on the surface it looked like a pretty crappy thing to do, the Game of Thrones fan in me sees the forest through the trees and I still have logical hope.
First and foremost, let’s give a round of applause to Jaime Lannister for stopping yet another man from imposing himself onto Brienne of Tarth. Him standing up and blocking Tormund was not him claiming Brienne. It was him protecting a woman from an uncomfortable situation. In situations where a man is approaching a woman and making her feel uncomfortable, if you can, please stand up and protect.
Then later Jaime learns that Cersei may be in danger and he starts to ride south for King’s Landing and this is where Game of Thrones fans forgot what show they were watching. Yes, Jaime left Winterfell to “be with Cersei.” However, allow me to remind you of an earlier episode in the season where Arya and her direwolf Nymeria said their goodbyes. In order to protect her wolf, she threw rocks at her to get her to not follow her because she knew if Nymeria was there it would mean her death. This parallels with Jaime telling Brienne all of the things he had done for his sister. He told her so she wouldn’t follow him. He told her all of that to keep her safe from danger. Think about it, what happened the last time a crazy monarch put an entire city in danger and risk of certain death? Jaime Lannister knows who he is, he’s the kingslayer and it’s time for him to go to work. So when it comes to Game of Thrones, not everything is what it seems.
- In Conclusion
While there’s nothing wrong with forming a connection with a fictional character, it’s also important to not reinforce toxic behaviors in the real world on to them. Just because someone likes someone, doesn’t make them entitled to that person. Especially if they’ve never made any sort of connection. Also, remember that consent is always important. If no one is down to clown, don’t continue to try to mess around. Thank you so much for reading this, I hope you took home something very valuable from it.
The views and opinions expressed in this article are the author’s, and do not necessarily reflect those of Temple of Geek.
About Author
As for my take (blah blah spoilers blah blah):
Well… the author is certainly entitled to his opinion. He’s wrong, but he’s certainly free to share it.
Tormund saw someone who he was attracted to – a strong, capable woman and warrior, two traits that are in high regard with his people. He comes from a simpler folk who don’t couch their emotions in romantic trappings, so he does what works with the people he knows – he’s very overt in his mannerisms, tells grandiose stories to talk himself up, and presents himself as a possible suitor. He makes his play, fails, and respects her wishes. I like how the writer blows off Tormund’s moments where his respect is demonstrated. Tormund never felt “entitled” to Brienne – when he realizes she doesn’t want him the way he does, he shrugs and moves on.
For Brienne, she still has baggage from her “Brienne the Beauty” moment where the boys all pretended she was attractive. She has no real experience in romance other than that night, so when a man starts coming on strong, she rejects it. The men she loves/loved (Renly and Jaime) treat her with respect, but neither view her as an object of romantic interest.
For Jaime, he respects Brienne as a paragon of knighthood – she is everything he wishes he could be, but is forever stigmatized as the Kingslayer and dishonorable, no matter how great a knight he thinks he is. He’s not attracted to her as a woman, but as an idea. Over the course of his story, he treats very few people with respect – specifically Barristan Selmy who he saw as a mentor and ideal knight and Ned, who he saw as an equal and someone to challenge to prove his worth. Unfortunately he’s also in need of some serious counseling. He’s not pining after Brienne – while she starts off treating him the same as everyone else, she moves beyond the “just a kingslayer” and sees that he wants to be an honorable knight and comes to respect him. He just doesn’t know how to react and confuses it with love. Once he wakes up from the post-fight with the undead stupor, and it comes down to real emotional connection, he still views himself as broken and unworthy and slinks off back to Cersei.
Thank you so much! I completely agree with this assessment of the situation. Tormund is a humorous loyal to his clan kind of guy with no innate cruelty ; however, he has only been essentially catcalling her the whole time.
“I hope you took home something very valuable from it.” <– Humble brag much, brah?